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dont panic down for maintenanceHow do we get rid of the guilt of needing time to ourselves in a busy world? I am still working on that how, but I have made the connection that my soul needs down time…almost the same amount of down time as I need uptime. that is who I am, that is how I function, that is what I need. The past few years as I have fought that, I have tried to follows others examples of how they function, I have tried to change my patterns and be like other productive people…and guess what happened? I crashed and burned, suffered anxiety attacks, cried a lot (not in front of anyone of course) and general became miserable. I don’t like miserable and I am not going to take it anymore.

I am now choosing me, choosing to take the quiet time I need for the simple fact that I need it. I am choosing to see me for who I am and not compare myself to others. I am choosing to move forward in my way, I am choosing my life not someone else’s. I am perfectly imperfect and that is okay. I will continue to learn, continue to work hard, continue to grow…but I will also play, laugh, climb trees and retreat when I need to. For me downtime is a must have to be healthy…so I am gonna take it!

Peace and Joy to you all!

Kim

PS since writting this article I have found some great ways to get that much needed downtime...if you want to take some time for yourself and learn some of those ways, come join us June 1-3, 2018 at Camp Exhale Women's Retreat...a retreat I created to encourage women to take that much needed downtime!   https://campexhalejune2018.eventbrite.com

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I have spent the better part of the last few months in what I can now see as my own little pity party…and if there is one thing I am good at it is throwing a party. I had balloons, special napkins and lots to eat.

Well not literally but looking back on it now Well not literally but looking back on it now I can see how I fed myself some pretty big dishes of negativity, self doubt and condemnation. I know on the outside nobody would see this, because I did not invite anyone else to my party…just me and my ego with the occasional appearance from my good friend spirit who supported me in my need to throw this party but also got me to come outside for a breath of fresh air once in awhile.

I have a great life, I know that and deep down I am a happy, extremely smart, optimist gal… I know I am good at what I do…I know I am on the right path…that is my authentic me and I do know her well. She is what keeps me going even on the dark days when I am dancing up a storm at my party and can’t find the exit! (and sometimes not even looking for the exit)

These past few months I have let my perceived failures truly get to me. I am frustrated at the financial situation I have placed my family due to my inability to make money…There I said it! I have been in business for 9 years now, have made some giant mistakes that I have learned a great deal from but at the end of the day I seem to be paralyzed to get myself out of the financial pit I have placed myself and my family.I have worked with lots of others to clear my beliefs that are holding me back, to clear my beliefs about money and my abilities…I second guess my abilities and what the hell I am in business for. “maybe I should not be running a business” “does anyone even want my help?” “Do I have perceived value for people or should I just give up and go work at Walmart…they are always hiring” (that makes me sick to my stomach to even consider :) that is the conversation that runs through my head during my pity party and I can say I am very tired of the music playing there.

I am barring my soul here for all of you to see…my ego is yelling loudly at me to shhhh we aren’t suppose to talk about that stuff…it’s embarrassing and private. Well fuck private, I know there are others out there who are also suffering in silence. Who think they are alone in their self doubt and can’t find the exit to their pity parties too. I am tired of this party, it’s no fun and I am tired of being alone…I am now heading for the exit and if I can inspire even one other person to head for the exit too then awesome.

One of the things I have brought to my party is books, I love books. When I am tired of all the chaos at this party I sit in a corner and open a book…I truly believe that my spirit provides these books for me as whatever page I happen to open the book on is exactly what I need to hear on my quest to actually move to the exit…today that book was Yes! Energy by Loral Langemeir and the words off the page was all about dusting off my dreams…I have dreams…I have big dreams…I just forgot about them lately as I wallowed in the failed attempts at fulfilling them! OMG that’s right…my past was just failed attempts…but sitting at this pity party is not getting me anywhere, I am not attempting anything, sh!t that wont get me anywhere will it? You see having a dream gives me a purpose to get the hell out of here…something to head towards on the other side of the exit. She talks about optimism and the I can do it attitude and about our conversations…here is little blurb from the book:

Changing the conversation shifts expectations and actions…(for me the conversation is mostly in my own head) A new conversation, one that emphasizes “because I can,” leads to a revival of dreams, which fuels energy, shifts attitude, and inspires optimism. Optimism is what makes us move forward into positive action that can make our lives much bigger and better.

On a day where I was feeling sick, tired and stuck this really struck a cord and pushed me to the exit of my pity party, stepping outside the door, taking a huge breath of fresh air, cleaning the dust off my dreams and knowing that all the answers I seek are inside of me and that my authentic optimistic self will move me forward towards positive change and towards my dreams, BECAUSE I CAN!

Here’s to dreaming big,

Love Kim xox

Spring has sprung, the grass is rise, I wonder where my garden rake is? I know it is here somewhere?  Normally this conversation with yourself results in the decision that it is time to clean out the garage.

I’m so excited to announce that my book ‘Release The Clutter’ is finally being released.  After almost a year in the writing process and  years of learning, growing and research with clients, it’s ready to share.

It Doesn’t matter where you start…what matters is that you do start! One room, one corner, one drawer…anywhere, Just START De-Cluttering!